I look better un-naked...
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
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