I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
