Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
Randomize
