Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
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