She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
did you just send me my own nude
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
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