I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
Randomize
