She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
Randomize
