Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
My credit card got frozen due to suspicious activity. "Let's go over your recent transaction history... it looks like these are all at bars." BITCH, DON'T JUDGE MY MONDAY NIGHTS.
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
Oh god it's open bar.
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
Randomize
