Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
Hippo gnu deer
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
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