He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
You remember that guy i fucked in Ireland who stopped in the middle to talk about why he had 8 pillows on his bed? Yeah he's following me on twitter...
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
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