We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
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