She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
My vagina is officially offended.
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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