Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
Probably should plan this out. Step one: grow stache. Two: get trenchcoat. Three: Kidnap Selena Gomez.
I had better be fucking involved with step four.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
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