they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
while you were getting the key to the dorm from the lobby i was giving a drunk monolog to the security camera about my life
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?
Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
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