Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
So I hogged the stall at Denny's for so long that a little kid shit his pants and ran crying to his mother. Am I a terrible person for this being the proudest moment of my life?
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize