also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
Randomize