I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize
