Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
Do you have swine flu?
I know my taste in men is not always top notch; however, I don't sleep with swine.
Pigs, yes. Swine, no.
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
Randomize
