You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
I think your dad took our porno
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
Randomize
