Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
Any idea why the fuck i would replace all the music on my ipod with the fucking Goosebumps theme song?!?
Apparently drunk you is really nostalgic?
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
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