Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
but dude how did I get so drunk?
Pretty sure it happened right after you poured a shot of Wild Turkey into your Budweiser, chugged it, and screamed "I. NEVER. BACK. DOWN!"
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
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