Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
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