There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
He is such a slut. More and more my type.
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
My new years resolution is going to be to stop drunk snapchatting old hook ups asking them when we're going to bang again
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
I'm eating animal crackers on my bed next to my vibrator writing about the hopelessness and depravity of humanity. I am LIVING.
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
Randomize
