I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
I am going to get arrested. I am yelling fuck repeatedly, wearing a Bird jersey and polka dot pants while pounding wine. Amazing mug shot to follow.
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
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