are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
Randomize
