Seriously, I would hit on barney the dinosaur right now if it meant I was going to get laid.
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
the room spins SO much faster in panama
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
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