your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize