No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Randomize
