do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
Been in the ER for 3 hours now. This hospitals transition to paperless is not going well. But my doctor looks like Elton John and just gave me percocet
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
It was a blind-side dick pic.
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
Randomize
