Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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