a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
Floor bacon is actually really good
I don't want my vagina anymore.
Randomize
