weddingsv make me drug and hornr
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
