Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
it glows. i had to have it.
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize