i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
Note to self: Don't go home with a recent divorcee. Semen and tears.
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
Im crossing my legs while on the toilet. It's like I'm unconsciously thinking "if im going to barf and shit at the same time, Im at least going to do it LIKE A LADY"
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
Randomize
