my facebook friend requests are always from girls of boyfriends i have fucked, facebook is the worst reminder of shame
Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
Randomize
