Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
Just got an x-ray done of my hip and you can clearly see the outline of my penis in it. When the doctor saw it she said "wow I haven't seen one that big on an x-ray before." Pretty sure the doc and the nurses are going to be talking about me on their lunch break.
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
Randomize
