Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
Randomize
