id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
Have you seen my high heels that I wore out?
You mean the one that you threw at the parked cop car or the one in the microwave?
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
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