we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
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