I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
Randomize
