I woke up at 7am naked in my bathtub with the shower running. My apartment was so full of steam that my ceiling was dripping. Who thought it would be okay for me to get my own place, anyway?
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
I'll wind up on his doorstep with a confused "oh you live here" expression, a feigned ankle injury and a seemingly fortunately placed bottle of tequila. I don't care what it takes: HIS MOUTH WILL BE ON MOUTH.
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
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