are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
Randomize
