Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
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