We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
Randomize
