How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
My underwear smells like fireworks.
I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
Randomize
