well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
You pole danced in your parka.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Randomize
