Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
so explain to me why i woke up in jail this morning
because you opened a jar or pickles and a bag of fritos and layed down in the middle of aisle 7 while singing 'la cucaracha'
no more ever clear
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
When people ask about my bruises, I'm just going to say it was a doorknob. Or possibly a group of doorknobs. Angry doorknobs.
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
Randomize
