her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
Randomize