I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
Randomize
