ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
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