did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Randomize
