Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
I’m gonna stop you right there. The last time you had a “brilliant” idea, I woke up to my kitchen covered in flour and a javelin through my tv.
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